As an unproud American citizen, the last thing that I want to do is to serve in our U.S military. First, I would not last a second in the military. I’m so weak I sometimes need to ask for help just to open a water bottle. Second, how am I supposed to slay or to be hot while running around throwing grenades or wearing those god awful camouflage uniforms? My priorities just don’t align with their lifestyle. Let’s not even mention the many problems surrounding the military. How am I supposed to live, laugh, love when a bunch of men are fighting so they can boost their egos instead of talking about their emotions? It’s about time we reconsider how we as a country wish to represent ourselves and spend our time and money.
To start off, we need to cut our military spending dramatically and put that money to good use. We could do so much: adopt universal healthcare, improve the Pinky Toe budget, and even pay off our tuition so we don’t need to get hit by the T to avoid college debt. The possibilities are endless!
Moreover, we need to reconsider how we want to use our military. We shouldn’t be fighting in wars or killing people (unless we’re going up against BC). Instead, we need to focus our time and effort on what really matters… yassifying them to the fullest extent possible. I’m talking about ditching the camo uniforms and putting them in pink ones instead. Or better yet, full drag. Instead of getting on their hands and knees to do push ups, they should be getting on their hands and knees to twerk. Instead of being able to pass tests for physical fitness, those wishing to enlist must prove they are able to serve cunt…I can’t think of a better way for the people in the military to serve our CUNTry.